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How To Be Successful And Fulfilled

How To Be Successful And Fulfilled

to navigate their way to being both really competent really good at something and successful in any sort ofmonetary way but also maintaining fulfillment um throughout their life I

think there are two two main things to take away from that one is to not over focus on long-term planning like I think we lionize having long-term goals and that's okay there's nothing wrong with having long-term goals

but those aren't necessarily always so useful for you in the moment right when I think about myself when I was a competitive 800 meter Runner I could

have a time goal for the end of the race but that didn't help me actually do anything that just you see the clock

when you're done and you're either happy or sad having goals that are let me try let me try moving with 300 meters to go

that gives you an actionable experiment so short-term planning I think is is one of the takeaways uh and and creating

what's called a self-regulatory practice so self-regulatory learning

is means basically thinking about your own thinking taking accountability for your for your own learning and some of

some of the coolest studies in self-regulatory learning actually came out of soccer football done in the

Netherlands where this woman named Ry elfring gemer was following kids from the age of 12 right up through some of

them went on to teams that um you know were Runners up in the world cup and what she'd see in the kids who

got off performance plateaus there were certain physi measur someone had to have like if a kid couldn't hit at least 7 me

a second sprinting which isn't that fast but if they couldn't hit it they weren't making it to the top that's so there were physiological parameters but also

the kids who would get off performance plateaus were the ones where if you look at them in video when they're they're younger they're saying going to the

trainer like why are we doing this drill I think I can do this already like I think I need to work on this other thing

and and you know sometimes a trainer might be like oh man just get back in line you know but these are the kids

that are thinking about what they need to work on what they're good at they're

making this cycle the the self-regulatory cycle is reflect what are you good or bad at what do you need to work on how do you need to do that

plan come up with an experiment for how you can work on that monitor a way to try to measure whether objectively or

subjectively and then evaluate did that experiment that I ran work and making me better at this thing or not and people

who do that repeatedly they just keep improving and I think that's what the dark horses are doing in their careers

they're saying I'm reflecting on what I've got I'm planning a way to test something that'll fit me I monitor it

maybe subjectively maybe objectively and then I evaluate what that tells me to do for the next step and you just get

better and better and better over time so if I'm say I'm in my early 20s in my career how do I take that and then

Implement Implement that in a within my life to make sure that I'm going to get to the World Cup metaphorically speaking

Yeah so and there's something interesting about the 20s that I think is worth saying which is there's this

finding in Psychology called the end of History illusion and this is the finding that we always underestimate how much we

will change what we think we're good at what we think we're bad at how we want to spend our time what we prioritize in friends Etc and EV at every step in life people

underestimate how much they'll change in the future change continues for your whole life it does slow down so we're constantly Works in progress claiming tobe finished constantly through life the fastest time of Personality change is about 18 to about 28 when you're telling but it never stops but that's about the fastest time when we're telling people hey now you have to have it figured out right and that's when they're changing like crazy and so I think it's even more important to have this self-regulatory practice in a journal I would say I mean

I do it these questions can be basic what am I trying to do why what do I need to learn to do it who do I need to help me learn that how am I going to make sure that person is there to help me what experiment can I set up to try it and then come back and evaluate the 

experiment and pick a next one be being a scientist of your own development I think is Inc it it's counterintuitive because you would think that we would just internalize this stuff just from doing things M but the science is pretty clear that we we don't

get everything we can out of our experiences from a learning perspective unless we're doing it more explicitly so I would recommend for someone in their

20s to start this self-regulatory practice what got you into the work that you do and how did you define your

profession okay so in my past life I was training to be a scientist environmental scientist I was like living up in the

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